Day 10
Every person on earth has lived through uncomfortable experiences. This experience for me has been a journey of Self. For me I have realised that being uncomfortable is unavoidable.
The interaction with uncomfortable has been a very difficult one for me as throughout my years of growing I have always struggled with feeling comfortable in my own skin, this resulted in major anxiety which continues to define me today.
When I was given the task to do a 10 day intervention, I thought to myself Wow Vega Really?? Aint Nobody got time for this.
However my 10 day journey of Body (un)comfortable has been an interesting one for me, and more importantly it has given me so much, I got to take away from this task so much of myself and I got to give so much of myself in the process.
Dressing as domestic worker for the past 10 days I felt completely separate from my body and from myself, I felt small as if I didn't belong.
Very early in my journey the idea of self began to form. From the beginning I was told all kinds of things and these details, ideas and opinions of others stuck with me which went towards building myself. My sense of self. However this intervention has come to an end and I'm a bit sad that I have to return to MySELF.
Note To Self: Figure out how to live more and more for your essence by getting under your own skin.
Remolding your life:
Tuesday, 2 June 2015
Monday, 1 June 2015
A Day in the life of Me.
Day 9
There Was School Today. It was miserable. The Vega Students kept asking me all sorts of questions. My biggest fear is someone asking me to clean something gross. If I had a million Rand to spend in a single day, Today I would buy my degree.
Argggg... I still cant believe the security guards gave me such a hard time today. Seriously???
The best part of my day was Buying a mcflurry in McDonald's and the person serving me was so shocked. The best part had to be her facial person.
But The cherry on top of my day today 22:00- Lights Out.
x
There Was School Today. It was miserable. The Vega Students kept asking me all sorts of questions. My biggest fear is someone asking me to clean something gross. If I had a million Rand to spend in a single day, Today I would buy my degree.
Argggg... I still cant believe the security guards gave me such a hard time today. Seriously???
The best part of my day was Buying a mcflurry in McDonald's and the person serving me was so shocked. The best part had to be her facial person.
But The cherry on top of my day today 22:00- Lights Out.
x
We want Better Cleaning products
Day 8
After a long day of catching up on lectures and Assignments, I got offered jobs.
My Lecture offered me a Job today, and I forgot to mention to her that I would only work for her if her couch is comfortable and she has DSTV, oh and no pets, I'm allergic, and of course better food.
Finally The people from the restaurant which is just down the road asked me where I work, I explained to them that it was part of a 10 day intervention I was doing on the body uncomfortable. They asked me how this makes me feel uncomfortable and I replied that when deciding to be a domestic worker it mentally made me uncomfortable, but little did I know that on my first day I would not only be mentally uncomfortable but both physically too.
Appearance Say's a thousand words, I care so much about the way I look and what people say that I would rather not leave the house on a bad hair day. During this intervention I have realised that even though people stare and talk, life goes on, they leave and carry on with their day and so should I. people don't really actually care, but it has always been a mental thing for me.
x
After a long day of catching up on lectures and Assignments, I got offered jobs.
My Lecture offered me a Job today, and I forgot to mention to her that I would only work for her if her couch is comfortable and she has DSTV, oh and no pets, I'm allergic, and of course better food.
Finally The people from the restaurant which is just down the road asked me where I work, I explained to them that it was part of a 10 day intervention I was doing on the body uncomfortable. They asked me how this makes me feel uncomfortable and I replied that when deciding to be a domestic worker it mentally made me uncomfortable, but little did I know that on my first day I would not only be mentally uncomfortable but both physically too.
Appearance Say's a thousand words, I care so much about the way I look and what people say that I would rather not leave the house on a bad hair day. During this intervention I have realised that even though people stare and talk, life goes on, they leave and carry on with their day and so should I. people don't really actually care, but it has always been a mental thing for me.
x
Mind, Body and Soul
Day 7
I don't have to stress about what to wear anymore. That's a relief. I have a hectic day ahead of me, and getting dressed doesn't take me As long as it used to anymore.
All Dressed.
I'm getting comfortable with the way I look, the looks and stares don't really bother me anymore. However it does bother me that people belittle domestic workers without even knowing them, the way people look at me bothers me, its as if I don't exist, one person today at Sandton asked me where the bathroom was and because Sandton city is my playground I smiled politely and pointed her in the wrong direction. I shouldn't have done that but at the time is what fun.
Lunch with the girls. they are not impressed. I'm feeling a bit awkward now because my friends are unhappy that I still need to dress this way. my friends are single. and they are yelling at me for embarrassing them in public and chasing all the good looking men away, simply because of how I look.
Undressed.
Got Home. took of my domestic worker clothes and thought about the way my friends judged the outfit and how I supposedly ruined lunch and how the next Lunch is on me.
Nothing Personal.
X
I don't have to stress about what to wear anymore. That's a relief. I have a hectic day ahead of me, and getting dressed doesn't take me As long as it used to anymore.
All Dressed.
I'm getting comfortable with the way I look, the looks and stares don't really bother me anymore. However it does bother me that people belittle domestic workers without even knowing them, the way people look at me bothers me, its as if I don't exist, one person today at Sandton asked me where the bathroom was and because Sandton city is my playground I smiled politely and pointed her in the wrong direction. I shouldn't have done that but at the time is what fun.
Lunch with the girls. they are not impressed. I'm feeling a bit awkward now because my friends are unhappy that I still need to dress this way. my friends are single. and they are yelling at me for embarrassing them in public and chasing all the good looking men away, simply because of how I look.
Undressed.
Got Home. took of my domestic worker clothes and thought about the way my friends judged the outfit and how I supposedly ruined lunch and how the next Lunch is on me.
Nothing Personal.
X
Saturday, 30 May 2015
Tea Break
Day 5
There are no Domestic workers in the Gym and I'm suddenly feeling uncomfortable with it.
As I walked into the gym midday for a quick spinning class I realised that everybody was starring at me.
This suddenly made me feel very uncomfortable.
What is the help doing in the Gym They ask themselves?
I quickly run to the change rooms and get into my Gym gear.
Within a few minutes of gentle warm up stretches, I saw the ladies that were in the change rooms with me staring directly at me. I tried to focus on the stretching, but i found all I could think about was, what is going through their heads? do they think I should be cleaning the change rooms? do they think I work here? do they think Virgin active is giving employee perks to the cleaning staff?
I was completely unable to focus on the class, instead feeling so aware of the woman starring at me.
x
There are no Domestic workers in the Gym and I'm suddenly feeling uncomfortable with it.
As I walked into the gym midday for a quick spinning class I realised that everybody was starring at me.
This suddenly made me feel very uncomfortable.
What is the help doing in the Gym They ask themselves?
I quickly run to the change rooms and get into my Gym gear.
Within a few minutes of gentle warm up stretches, I saw the ladies that were in the change rooms with me staring directly at me. I tried to focus on the stretching, but i found all I could think about was, what is going through their heads? do they think I should be cleaning the change rooms? do they think I work here? do they think Virgin active is giving employee perks to the cleaning staff?
I was completely unable to focus on the class, instead feeling so aware of the woman starring at me.
x
Wednesday, 27 May 2015
Woman of the House.
Day 4
So Today I was feeling a bit down and decided to do my hair and make up and wear a pair of my favourite sunglasses with my domestic worker outfit.
The reactions I got today where mixed but most people asked me if I was sleeping with my Madam's husband or if I got a wage increase. I laughed it off and carried on with my day.
I have heard many stories of domestic workers getting it down with the man of the house. Some do it because they are too scared to lose their jobs when the man makes advances and others do it simply to show the lady of the house that they too are capable.
If I was going to be running another woman's household then how can my employer not expect me to take over and be the woman of the house.
After 4 days in the Job, today I am feeling more confident. and i am more positive that ever that just like any other job I can climb the appropriate ladder and get myself a promotion.
This is after all the new South Africa.
So Today I was feeling a bit down and decided to do my hair and make up and wear a pair of my favourite sunglasses with my domestic worker outfit.
The reactions I got today where mixed but most people asked me if I was sleeping with my Madam's husband or if I got a wage increase. I laughed it off and carried on with my day.
I have heard many stories of domestic workers getting it down with the man of the house. Some do it because they are too scared to lose their jobs when the man makes advances and others do it simply to show the lady of the house that they too are capable.
If I was going to be running another woman's household then how can my employer not expect me to take over and be the woman of the house.
After 4 days in the Job, today I am feeling more confident. and i am more positive that ever that just like any other job I can climb the appropriate ladder and get myself a promotion.
This is after all the new South Africa.
We are care takers not SLAVES.
Day 3
I'm going to talk a little bit about my helper today. Since I didn't leave the house I spoke to her for a bit.
Wake up, fix breakfast, get the children ready for school, laundry, house cleaning, cook dinner and repeat.
My nana has been with my family for 25 years. She raised me and my sisters. Throughout those years she has had 2 children. Both whom I consider family.
During Those years nana has had many problems. She has had difficulty with being away from her family and money problems, with her Job she has not been able to provide for her family the way she would have liked to.
Nana never left and when I asked her why she said its because she really Loves us and that she See's us as her own family now.
not every care taker's story is like my Nana's story but I share it because she is my second mother and I appreciate her more than anything in the world today.
Many care takers often have difficult times mainly because of low wages and ill treatment. however they do some of the most essential human work, taking care of us and our basic needs but their work is totally undervalued by our society and this devaluation is institutionalised by our government. For many years domestic workers have been excluded from basic human protection and today Domestic workers still lack many of the basic protections that many of us take for granted.
As South Africans we should stand together to honour our caretakers who have done this work for many years, to show deep appreciation for the woman who raise future generations we need Good employers to stand up for labour rights and give domestic workers respect.
Below is the link of the labour act in South Africa:
http://www.labour.gov.za/DOL/downloads/documents/useful-documents/basic-conditions-of-employment/domesticworker2012.pdf
I'm going to talk a little bit about my helper today. Since I didn't leave the house I spoke to her for a bit.
Wake up, fix breakfast, get the children ready for school, laundry, house cleaning, cook dinner and repeat.
My nana has been with my family for 25 years. She raised me and my sisters. Throughout those years she has had 2 children. Both whom I consider family.
During Those years nana has had many problems. She has had difficulty with being away from her family and money problems, with her Job she has not been able to provide for her family the way she would have liked to.
Nana never left and when I asked her why she said its because she really Loves us and that she See's us as her own family now.
not every care taker's story is like my Nana's story but I share it because she is my second mother and I appreciate her more than anything in the world today.
Many care takers often have difficult times mainly because of low wages and ill treatment. however they do some of the most essential human work, taking care of us and our basic needs but their work is totally undervalued by our society and this devaluation is institutionalised by our government. For many years domestic workers have been excluded from basic human protection and today Domestic workers still lack many of the basic protections that many of us take for granted.
As South Africans we should stand together to honour our caretakers who have done this work for many years, to show deep appreciation for the woman who raise future generations we need Good employers to stand up for labour rights and give domestic workers respect.
Below is the link of the labour act in South Africa:
http://www.labour.gov.za/DOL/downloads/documents/useful-documents/basic-conditions-of-employment/domesticworker2012.pdf
Saturday, 23 May 2015
A day in the life of a South African Maid
Day 2
As I walked into Sandton city this morning, I felt myself sinking.
As I approached one of my favourite shops, I considered not going in and turning back and just going home, But none the less my friend pulled me in.
As I walked into Top Shop I looked around to see the people around me, starring at the domestic worker in such a high end shop. only Today the domestic worker was me, I felt a shiver going down my neck as I one of the employees whom I knew very well just walked passed me, not recognising me and not offering me help.
At this point I felt angry, I was angry because just like all the other people who were in the store, I was a customer too, and deserved the same amount of help and attention as the person standing next to me, instead I was overlooked.
After Today's experience I was in such a hurry to get home because I felt so little so uncomfortable and so betrayed. Betrayed by society and their perceptions, and a little betrayed in myself for not feeling comfortable in my own skin.
I will try again tomorrow.
x
As I walked into Sandton city this morning, I felt myself sinking.
As I approached one of my favourite shops, I considered not going in and turning back and just going home, But none the less my friend pulled me in.
As I walked into Top Shop I looked around to see the people around me, starring at the domestic worker in such a high end shop. only Today the domestic worker was me, I felt a shiver going down my neck as I one of the employees whom I knew very well just walked passed me, not recognising me and not offering me help.
At this point I felt angry, I was angry because just like all the other people who were in the store, I was a customer too, and deserved the same amount of help and attention as the person standing next to me, instead I was overlooked.
After Today's experience I was in such a hurry to get home because I felt so little so uncomfortable and so betrayed. Betrayed by society and their perceptions, and a little betrayed in myself for not feeling comfortable in my own skin.
I will try again tomorrow.
x
Theme: The Body (un)comfortable
You live in two spheres of beauty. The first sphere is your physical reality, your own body. The other is less tangible. It lives only in your mind - your aspirations and your concept of ideal beauty that you would like to attain. Realistically, these two poles will never meet.
By emotionally stepping back from your my own situation. through my 10 day intervention I will unpak my own level of discomfort.
Friday, 22 May 2015
Tea Break
YOU BROKE MY CHINA!!!
Hello and welcome to my blog.
In a country like South Africa being black and being the help,
is not a new phenomena.
I will be maintaining my intervention both publicly and privately for the next 10 days. During my 10 day period I will balance my blog with a combination of videos, relevant research, diary entries and visuals.
Day 1: The body (un)comfortable
Today I am dressed as a Domestic worker in South Africa and it is
like nothing I have ever felt before.
The reason I chose to dress like a domestic worker was because psychologically
it made me feel uncomfortable and out of my skin.
I'm rushing to Vega to hand in an assignment. The receptionist I speak to everyday, doesn't recognise me today. She stops me and asks me if I need help, I yell No and rush past her only to realise 5 minutes later that she has been following me. I stop to explain to her that I'm not lost and that I am a Vega student and that this is part of an assignment. I then make my way past a group of 1st years on the staircase, on my way back from handing in the students are whispering 'See, I told you she is not a domestic worker, she can speak English properly'.
All in all I have had so many different reactions. Some barely recognised me and walked right passed me. others stared as I spoke to my friends. others laughed. and others asked me questions.
Rushing home I realised that I didn't feel like cooking and should probably get a snack on the way. stopped at a restaurant 2min away from where I stay and for me this made me crawl out of my skin. I was extremely uncomfortable as the people there know me and I knew some of the customers in the restaurant. I realised today how important my appearance is to me and how it was so easy for me to feel small and out of my skin. I felt like my reputation was flushed down the toilet and that people would never look at me the same way.
x
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